Let’s talk about sex

It was almost as if we won’t make it here,  but tell mama we  made it!!!!!!

Today,  we will discuss the place of sex in a relationship.  We definitely have an idea of what sex is about, so let’s not pretend it doesn’t happen.  I received a mail from one of our readers it says “Hi Sanchez,  I’ve been a relationship for a year and 3months now and I  love my boyfriend so much but recently he is disturbing me about sex and I’m still a Virgin. He says I don’t love him because I refuse to let him have sex with me and I’m scared of loosing him. I don’t know what to do”

One thing you should know is that, Sex isn’t what you should be forced to do. Having sex in a relationship shouldn’t be mandatory,  especially when it’s yet be a matrimonial union and  for you to have kept yourself this long, its something to be appreciated . If your partner wants to leave you over sex, then he doesn’t love you enough. At least, he knows the kind of person you were before you both started the relationship.

Trust in a relationship shouldn’t be based on sex, If he thinks you’ve never really loved him because of sex, that’s bad enough. If he truly loves you,  he won’t pester you about sex, he has to wait till you are comfortable with it.  You shouldn’t be compelled to do it.

To many people,  sex makes their relationship stand but this is due to the fact that the two that are involved are in agreement with it.  If you don’t want to have sex,  you still need to make him understand the reason you aren’t ready for it. He has to  reason along with you, because the two of you are involved. In addition, a relationship shouldn’t be self centred, remember it takes two to tango.  The both of you need to sit down and talk about it. The both of you just have to understand each other on this.

Above all, don’t be in a haste to do what you don’t intend doing.



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I'm Christiana Oni (Sanchez May), a writer, lover, friend & teacher. Anything that comes in chocolate form is definitely my favorite.

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23 Comments on Let’s talk about sex

  1. I disagree with your view bout sex and relationship, cuz relationship plays different role to different people. We all know sex isn’t a way of building a relationship but it’s the physical expression of love. Trust and love with sex are different thing entirely. I always advice if you feel sex would make you lose someone that you love try to improvise and protect what you have because you never know what the next man ways would be like. Known devil is better than unseen angel…. sex is part of relationship but it has to be at the right time and on both partner agreement. If you are sure he’s the right person for you then take a chance to protect what is your because at the end true love ain’t easy to come by, it take grace of God and sacrifice to make it possible….

    • hmmmmmm still on sex b4 marriage or during courtship,all men ar not d same tin anyway,sum guys will tell u having sex wit u will make d relationship last while sum will just use n dump u,it o
      nly take d grace of God ooooooo,1 of my model ohhhhhh RIP pastor Mrs Bimbo Odukoya she will say if d guy luvs u he will wait 4 u.

  2. I So much concur with ur perspective

    “Trust in a relationship shouldn’t be based on sex, If he thinks you’ve never really loved him because of sex, that’s bad enough. If he truly loves you, he won’t pester you about sex, he has to wait till you are comfortable with it. You shouldn’t be compelled to do it.”

  3. we all have different urge to sex, let encourange early marriage, once u love a girl marry her even if just to have a child only, in order to discourage fornication let laws of marriage be amend

  4. Love is not sex and sex is not love, sex is only encouraged in wedlock, if he loves u, he shld b able 2 wait til d appropriate time, and if he disagrees, I tink u shld leave him he might not b d rite man 4u.

  5. Love does not base on sex in any relationship and if the guy says dat wot he want then break the relationship and God will surely get another beta guy for u

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